And I am pissed.
The other day the mother of the bullies stopped my husband in the parking lot at the school and proceeded to cause a scene. Why? Because she didn’t feel it was needed for her to take responsibility of her children’s actions. She said that just because her children ripped TWO of our son’s jackets in FOUR separate spots didn’t mean that it wasn’t an accident. Are you kidding me?? I get that boys play rough. Believe me…I get it. But it stops being an accident when it repeatedly happens. But just by the looks of this mother and the way she chooses to carry on in front of others (especially her children) there was no getting through to her and my husband tried to drop it and walk away. She wasn’t having it.
So what happens the next day?
“My mom said that your mom and dad are idiots”
“My mom said that you are an idiot”
“My mom said that your mom has nothing better to do than to cause problems”
Really? Are you kidding me? How old is she? Who bashes other people to their children?
So of course, my husband and I met with the principal this morning. Not only were these two harassing Zachary with the way they were bashing his family all day long, but they also got in trouble on lunch recess by throwing a ball repeatedly at his face. Zachary went and told and guess what the lunch aid did…she put them on the wall. Again I ask you, what the heck does the wall do? Why in the world were they not sent to the principal for physically hurting another person? What in the world has to happen for some action to be taken? Does his face have to be bashed in?
Our meeting with the principal was a waste of time. Basically we were told that there is nothing he can do until he or another adult hears or sees something happen. Again I ask, does his face have to bashed in for the school to take notice? I am well aware of the districts harassment policy and bullying policy, as well as the State of Michigan’s Anti-Bullying Legislation. And as far as I am concerned, the school is in violation of these policies. For Pete’s sake, we were told that Zachary should pick a different table at lunch if the bullies happen to be sitting at the same table as his friends, which I get…BUT why in the world are these bullies not given assigned seats if they are causing problems?? Why is my son being punished by not being able to sit with HIS friends? The principal even said that Zachary may not want to sit away from his friends or sit at a girl table. Can you blame him? He’s SEVEN! So he get’s punished by not being able to sit by his friends and he is further punished by sitting with all girls when you know darn well that will cause him to be teased. Why don’t we just sentence the boy to be made fun of all freaking day long?
I haven’t figured out what I am or can do right now. But I am beyond pissed off and feel that the school is failing him tremendously. And quite frankly, I feel like the school is catering to the bullies. Sure they make the necessary phone calls when something happens, but as soon as the mom or kids say “I didn’t do it”, the principal throws his hands up and says “well my hands are tied. It is now a he said/she said and I can’t choose one story over the other”. And maybe that’s true, but when you have story after story of how these boys are tormenting a child, you make damn sure you are around to CATCH them in the act. By not doing that, you are failing the victim.
This is SO frustrating Leah! I don’t have any advice, but I am behind you supporting your kid. I would be heartbroken if this was happening to me and would be kicking butt. Go momma!
Wow. I’m livid for him, AND YOU (not to mention your whole family). Since bullying is so prevalent in our society, you’d think the school system would step up a bit. I know that this puts you in an incredibly rough spot and I honestly can’t say what I would do if it were me. I’d LIKE to think I’d get authorities involved or at least pull my child out of that school environment. I am really anxious to hear what comes out of this. My heart aches for all of you.
Leah, this is absolutely disheartening. We always tell our children if there is something wrong, tell a teacher, a police officer, or the parent. What does this show Zach? That he can’t trust educators to help him stop bullying or the harassment. This shows lack of respect for your child on the part of the school and just all around bad judgement. If this was the principle’s kid that was being bullied, you know what would happen. That principle would move mountains to keep his / her child free from bullying. This upsets me to end. And this is the reason kids commit suicide because of bullying – because NOONE listened to them and took action to correct it! And I ask this… what is this showing the bullys? ” I can do this and get away with it because noone is doing anything about it. ” That’s crap! Utter crap! Take your story to the news media. I bet you’ll get a response then.
It bothers me so much. I cannot believe that they can just throw their hands up and be like “oh well we didn’t see it so it must not have happened”…that’s crazy. His teacher has been great. She has totally tried to figure out different ways to handle things and whatnot.
This is so rotten! I would be so pissed at that school and principal. Heck, it’s not even my family and I’m so pissed at the principal on your behalf!
First, call the school board. Second find a lawyer that will write a letter to the school saying that if appropriate action doesn’t take place, and that is action working in favor of your child, you plan to sue. Bullying has gotten a lot of attention in our area after a family sued the county for not protecting their child. Now just the mention of bullying has the administrators running scared. Have the letter suggest that all kids have assigned seats at lunch. What else is causing problems? Come up with fair solutions to provide to the admin and they are more apt to help. Good luck with this! My son has autism and we worry about this all the time.
I like this…thank you for commenting. I am going to sit down tonight and make a list of accommodations that I think are fair and reasonable to ask the school to do and will do exactly what you are suggesting. Thank you for taking the time to comment on this. I really do appreciate it.
Gosh, I’m so sorry. Bullying makes me so sad. I think other people have made some good suggestions. I don’t have anything to add except maybe to consider homeschooling or transferring if it gets too bad – of course, you should never be forced to leave a school that you like because of other people’s bad behaviour, I’m just throwing it out there in case things get really out of hand.
I am beyond livid for you. This is SO not right. I’m hoping (and praying) that these people get their act together. This is so wrong it’s not even funny.
All I can say is White Trash! I really feel for you because I have a horrible temper and if I was in your shoes Lord knows what would happen to that parent. I would tear into my children if they did something like that and would pay for the child’s jacket immmediately but people today have no morals and do not care. I would call the school district and make an appointment to speak to the superintendent not his secretary either! I hope you will be posting more updates on this {{{{{HUGS}}}}}
Not hard at all to see where these kids learn their boorish behavior from. I’m so sorry he is still having a hard time. I agree with the other poster about putting in writing some fair solutions. If that doesn’t work, then I’d be calling the state department and making as much racket as I could.