And the award for the meanest mom goes to….

ME!

At least according to my son right about now.

So picture this. You turn around to see your son putting his entire hand into the jar of peanut butter, shoving a HUGE amount into his mouth and then proceeding to rub it on his face. Before you even have a chance to think about what is going on, you reach for the peanut butter, but not before he spits up into the jar. You know, because he put more than any human mouth should have, into his mouth.

As you’re cleaning him off AND throwing away a perfectly good jar of peanut butter that now has liquid peanut butter drool sloshing around in it, you are trying to come up with a million and one punishments for this child.

• Time out in his room…yea that doesn’t sound like it suits the crime nor is it enough
• Take away all his toys…he’ll just annoy me more
• Take the television away…see above
• Take money from his piggy bank explaining to him that he has to pay for a new jar of peanut butter to replace the one he ruined

Ahhh that last one…pure genius! You would have thought that I did all of the above while ripping his arm out of the socket, and using his hand to take the money out of the piggy bank with the way he carried on.

Ladies and gentle, only a dollar in change was taking from the piggy bank. But to a child who has no concept of money…I just stole a million dollars from him. Hopefully my neighbors read this blog because I am sure they are thinking something awful just happened in this house…especially with a child screaming “mommy stop. Please mommy. Please stop”. I’m thinking he gets an award for best drama right there.